Would you like to write a message of support to the loved ones of someone who has passed away, but you’re not sure how to put it into words? Do you want to learn how to write a heartfelt note of condolence to honor someone who was dear to you?
I will help you.
As a florist, I have the privilege of being a part of and providing flowers for all of life’s moments, even the toughest ones. When purchasing a floral arrangement for a funeral, it’s recommended to include a small message of support.
Today, I’m sharing my experience in this area to help you compose an appropriate message for the situation that reflects what you would like to convey to the loved ones of the deceased.
Whether you send it by mail or include it with flowers at the funeral, your condolence message is intended to express your support for the family of the deceased and to share in their sorrow over the loss. When writing it, choose a tone that reflects your relationship with the person (colleague, close friend, family member, etc.). If you were close to the deceased, you might want to include cherished, positive memories, how you met, and what they meant to you. Don’t forget to sign with your full contact information so they can reach out to you.
Want to learn more? Keep reading to discover:
- When to write a condolence message
- How to write it, where to start, and how to express yourself
- Tips for using an appropriate tone
- Ideas for phrases you can draw inspiration from
- Why the eternal rose is a perfect symbol for paying tribute
When Should You Write a Condolence Message?
You just learned about the passing of someone, and you’re wondering if you should write a note to their loved ones to offer support during this difficult time? There’s no rule against it, as long as you’re not on bad terms with them.
On the contrary, this small message, beyond being just a polite gesture, is usually very appreciated by the family, as it shows your empathy for their loss and the fond memories you will hold of the deceased.
Most of the time, you may find yourself writing your condolences at three different occasions:
- When you learn about someone’s passing, if you cannot attend the funeral, you can write a letter.
- To accompany flowers for the burial, whether you can attend or not,
- During the ceremony, in a designated guestbook available for attendees.
👉 Unless you are very close to the deceased or their family, it’s not necessary to send multiple condolence messages. I recommend choosing just one of the previous channels to write your note of support.
How to Express Your Condolences in Writing
Since this is a challenging situation, often filled with emotion, it can be difficult to find the right words to express your sorrow and empathy. In the following lines, you will find some tips for writing a heartfelt and appropriate message.
Adjust Your Tone Based on Your Relationship with the Deceased
The way you express your condolences will vary depending on whether the deceased was a coworker, a friend, or a client, for example.
➡️ If this is a professional relationship, I recommend using a formal tone: you might express your condolences to the family rather than sharing personal feelings about the deceased.
➡️ If the deceased is a close colleague, a friend, a distant family member, or someone you saw regularly (like a neighbor), you can express the sorrow you feel about this sad news, but keep it moderate.
➡️ If it’s a member of your immediate family or a very close friend, you have much more freedom to express your emotions and feelings to honor that person and show how much you cared for them.
👉 During a time of mourning, it’s common to receive many sympathy messages. If you weren’t very close to the deceased, feel free to send a brief message. It will be easier for the family to respond.
Show Your Support for the Loved Ones of the Deceased
While they are typically an opportunity to evoke the heartfelt memories we hold of a person, condolence messages are meant for the closest family and friends to assure them of your support during these difficult times.
No matter the content of your message, be sure to speak directly to them, reminding them that you share in their sorrow and that you are thinking of them during this difficult time.
Remember the everlasting memory you’ll cherish of the deceased
If you’d like, you can briefly touch on the positive memories you have of the person who has passed away. To help with this, consider answering the following questions:
- What do you appreciate about her?
- What was her greatest quality?
- How long have you known her? Where did you meet? Do you have any good memories from that time?
- What did this person bring to your daily life? What will you miss the most?
Don’t forget to sign and provide your contact information
When the loved ones of a deceased person receive condolence messages, they generally want to thank them by sending a small card or message in return.
To make things as easy as possible for them during this challenging time, I recommend that you clearly sign your message, including your address and phone number.
Some Phrases You Can Draw Inspiration From
In a situation like a death, it’s common to feel too overwhelmed or caught off guard to write a message. This is completely normal. To help you out, I’ve provided some phrases below that you can make your own or copy as they are to express your condolences.
👉 Is there a quote from a poet, a movie, or a song that inspires you particularly? You can definitely share it while mentioning its source. Sometimes, the words of others can express your feelings more easily, and that is completely understandable.
If You Didn’t Know the Deceased Well
Here are some expressions you can use in this situation:
🔸 I am saddened to hear about the passing of … . I offer my heartfelt condolences, and my thoughts are with you during this difficult time.
🔸 Our thoughts are with you during this difficult time. Please accept our sincere condolences.
🔸 Please accept our heartfelt condolences and our support during this difficult time.
🔸 Please accept my heartfelt condolences and the expression of my deepest sympathy.
If You Were Close to This Person
In this case, you can adopt a more casual tone:
🔹 I will always remember …, her laughter and the wonderful moments we shared together. I’m sending you all my support.
🔹 … was someone who changed my life. I share in your pain and sorrow during these difficult times.
🔹 I am very sad to hear about the passing of…. I will always remember….
If You Are Close to the Family of the Deceased
🔸 I’m thinking of you during this challenging time, and I’m sending you all my love and support.
🔸 I was saddened to learn of the passing of… and I am deeply heartbroken. My heartfelt condolences go out to you, and I am sending you strength and courage to face this challenging time.
🔸 The loss of a loved one is always heartbreaking. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time, and I share in your sorrow. My deepest condolences.
The Eternal Rose: A Perfect Gift to Honor a Loved One Who Has Passed Away
Do you want to accompany your message with a symbolic gift in memory of someone you cherish? The preserved rose is perfect for this situation, as it can be kept for years without any maintenance and without fading.
👉 Please note that these roses do not tolerate direct sunlight and harsh weather very well. This can shorten their lifespan. Therefore, they are more of a symbolic keepsake that can be kept with you or with the loved ones of the deceased.
When it comes to color, you can choose a flower:
You can also choose the favorite color of the lost loved one or a shade that inspires you. Feel free to visit our online shop to select from dozens of different models!
You can also cherish the memory of your loved one by treating yourself to a symbolic piece of jewelry that represents your bond. For this, Fleur Union recommends the dried flower jewelry from Atelier Passiflore. These handmade creations, crafted entirely by hand in a French workshop, allow you to preserve a flower in time, so you can always carry a tribute to someone dear to your heart.
I hope this article has helped you to write a condolence message that truly expresses what you want to say to the loved ones of the deceased. If you’re interested, you can also check out this article from the blog, which will help you find the perfect flowers to pay tribute at a funeral.